Do you ever feel like something is missing in your life?  Perhaps you’ve been stuck in the doldrums of the day-to-day tasks, or maybe you’ve been so focused on one area of your life that you feel extremely imbalanced.

Whatever your case may be, here are 5 things to consider that can help bring back a feeling of balance.

Full disclosure:  There is no actual balance in life.  And this is not a complete checklist of what to do, rather some ideas to try if you are feeling a little “off”.

1.  Do something you love that is NOT productive

Have you ever gotten lost in everything that you “need” to do, that you’ve forgotten you can take some time for the things you just “want” to do?  If you missed my post on “doing what you want”, check it out here.

It is so important for us to think of ourselves and just have fun or relax!

Here are some ideas of what I mean when I say “not productive”:

Read a fiction book

Watch a movie

Paint your nails

Draw, color, paint, etc.

Play a few songs on an instrument you’ve learned

Browse a bookstore or craft shop

Play a game (solitaire if no one to play with)

Play around with new hairstyles or makeup

Maybe you don’t love all those things, but hopefully you can get started thinking of your own list.  One thing that is NOT allowed on your list is social media, for obvious reasons.

But what about the things we love that ARE productive?

Yes, those are good too.  But I wanted to point out that every second of our lives does not have to be productive!

I used to feel so selfish taking time for myself that I thought if I was going to read, I should at least be a little productive and choose a self-help book over fiction.

Feel free to add anything to your list that may also be somewhat productive like going on a walk or to the gym, learning a new skill, or taking a nap.  Just make sure you leave plenty of opportunity for what you truly LOVE with no obligations or guilt.

I’ll remind you that whether it’s productive or not, it’s not selfish.  It’s FUN!  And it’s more than ok for you to have fun!

Read how important self-care is here.

 2.  Do something to enhance a relationship

Whether it’s a spouse, child, parent, sibling, friend, or anyone else, the quality time spent with someone you love will be well worth it.

What do we hear from those older and wiser than us?  No one has ever been on their death bed saying “I wish I would have spent more time working”.

The more time passes, the more I realize how important it is to me to make memories with my family.  I’m not a huge vacationer but that doesn’t mean I can’t still have quality time.

Taking my kids on dates once a month gives us one-on-one quality time.  And over the course of time will give us an overall memory of happy moments.  Even reading to them each night gives me a sweet feeling to look back on and remember their snuggles.

Dates with my husband, girls outings with my sister and mom, phone calls with my brothers, game nights with friends, family reunions… those are all wonderful ways to keep the relationships I love alive.

What kind of memories do you want to have?  Who do you want to spend quality time with and in what way?

If you ever feel stressed or overwhelmed, ask yourself when the last time was that you spent some good quality time with someone you care about.

3.  Do something to serve or help others

As important as it is to take time for ourselves, sometimes we can get a little carried away.

The past few months I have been really focused on me, me, me.

It is no simple undertaking to start a blog, and I have spent many hours writing and creating the website.  And to say the least, I was lacking in the service area of my life.

I knew that there was a heavy imbalance in my life, (as is to be expected during a phase of starting up something new).  But I didn’t pinpoint the shortage of “service” until the day I was helping out a friend by watching her littles.

In my busiest time, where I did not feel like I had anything to give, I found myself offering to watch 4 children, 6 years and under while their parents packed and cleaned their house to move a few days later.

There was something about giving my time and energy to help a friend in need that lifted my spirits to a place of “feeling like I got this”.  In fact it was so awesome (and her kids were little angels) that I asked if we could have them another day.

I needed this!

I thought I was helping her, but it was I who received the help.  Taking those breaks for a good cause gave me the mental boost that I desperately needed.

It helped bring some balance back into my life of constantly thinking of me, me, me.

In fact it was that experience that inspired me to write this very post.

In summary, sometimes it’s when you think you don’t have time to serve that you need it the most.

4.  Do something to work

When is the last time you had a “hard day’s work”?

Taking care of children has been my full time job for the past 13 years, and it is no easy thing.  Plus laundry, cleaning, cooking, all that good stuff too.

So yeah, that’s work, but not the type of work I’m referring to.

I mean, get your hands dirty and break your back kind of hard work!  Haha, ok, ok… be gentle on your back!

Last summer I bought 3 fruit trees and 3 lilac bushes and dug all the holes myself.  Digging is not for the faint of heart!  Haha.  It was some hard work, and when I was done I felt super accomplished and good inside!

In 2020, we did a major remodel in our house and I put in the new LVP floor by myself.  It was a ton of work, but oh so satisfying to run the big power tools and complete a huge project.

For me, there is something about physical labor that’s so fulfilling.  I like it.

But that doesn’t mean I do it all the time.  And it doesn’t have to be over-the-top physical either.  I get the same satisfaction when I mow the lawn!

I really hesitate to say it this way, but pretty much anything I would normally consider a “man’s job” is going to fit in this section.  Why should men get to have all the fun?  I’ll gladly send Tyler in to cook dinner while I bust the leaf blower out!

If you are stuck in a mundane cycle, try doing some sort of physical work that you don’t normally do and see if that shakes things up for ya.

5.  Do something to connect with God

Saved the best for last!  Are you mindful of the presence of God in your life?

What are your favorite ways to invite Him in?

How do you hear Him?

For me, I love prayer.

I love the temple.

I love reading general conference talks.

I love prayer.

I love pondering.

I love nature.

And I really, really love prayer…

Ok, yeah prayer is my ultimate favorite.  And in a way, everything else I listed is also a form of prayer; or adds to it at least.

You see, I usually have a prayer in my heart about something.  So when I go to the temple, I’m mindful of that prayer and carry it with me.  When I’m reading conference talks, pondering, or reflecting in nature, I’ve got that prayer always in the back (or forefront) of my mind and am open to receive an answer.

I’ve never had a time in my life where I completely shut God out, but I have had some times where I was super lazy about inviting Him in.  My prayers were either rushed and impersonal or nonexistent altogether.  I went to church, but did little to nothing in between Sunday’s.

Thinking back on those times vs where I am now, is such an interesting comparison.

I would not say that I was unhappy then, and I don’t recall feeling an emptiness in my life at the time.  But now that I know how sweet it is to have a relationship with a loving God, the word that comes up for my past self is “empty”.

I had no idea what I was missing.  But my life now is SO FULL, all I can think of is how empty it would be without Him.

Do you feel God’s love daily?  Do you think of Him when the sun shines on your face?  Do you sincerely pray to Him in love and gratitude?  If not, that’s ok.  Ask yourself if you’d like to do those things…

Have you had a hard experience in your life that has led you to lean on Him like never before?  I have fallen in love with His love and care for me, and it was through tough times that I truly deeply found Him.

Taking the time to really connect with God has been one of the greatest blessings of my life, and it is something I do daily because of the love, peace, and guidance I receive; and because of the love and gratitude I feel for Him.

I love Him.  And I know He loves me.

He loves you too.  What a treasure you are to Him.

Conclusion

There is no true balance in life.  Elder David A. Bednar said it best when he likens it to an acrobat spinning plates.

Not all the plates will ever be spinning at the same speed, you just need to know which one is closest to falling and put your efforts there.

I hope these 5 pointers will help give you some direction to make some clear choices in your life if and when you ever feel a little “off”.

Is there anything else that you would add?  What has helped give you a feeling of “balance” in your life?

Thank you for being here, I wish you the best!

Kayleen

SDG